Hey,
 
I am writing out of desperation about my very dominating female Tuli.
 
For 2 years we had our two males and added our first female Lulu last
winter.  Everything was great, everyone got alone.  4 months later we
rescued a neglected female who came to our family very over weight.  At
first things seemed fine-as she acclimated to Anthony, Ferris & Lulu.  It
has been just over a year since Tuli joined us and she is in great shape
now, very robust, in healthy weight, however her whole goal in life is
to dominate.  She constantly challenges Anthony authority, he ends up
kicking her butt out of frustration-and she gives and moves on.  She
doesn't seem that interested in controlling Ferris, perhaps because he is
really busy getting into some sort of trouble, he is a very busy boy &
not much interested in authority & wants to have fun, they seem to have
an understanding.  She is however unrelenting with our other female Lulu.
They are about the same age but Lulu is more petite & thin.
 
About 10 minutes after the start of play time I'll start hearing Lulu's
cries-most of the time Lulu doesn't even challenge Tuli-she simply rolls
over and stops moving-this is not enough for Tuli though-she will
continue biting her, probably trying to get her to flee.  This has become
a real problem for us all.  The rest of play time Tuli will chase Lulu
around biting her, standing over her and basically making her life very
unpleasant.  All the while one of us rescuing Lulu, picking her up &
relocating her, until it starts again.  Lulu even knows to come to one of
us for help when it goes on.  Ferris has now started picking on Lulu too!
Not like him at all.  At times I have divided their play times-putting
Lulu with Anthony & next Tuli with Ferris.  More often there simply is
not the time in a day to divide.  And Anthony misses Ferris & Lulu.  My
apartment does not allow space for divided same time play periods.
 
What to do?
 
I am very upset, concerned for our original 3, and am blaming myself for
over doing it.
 
Tuli is a sweetie with us and we love her, but do not know what to do
anymore.
 
We rotate toys, dig boxes, add new play items-etc, etc to distract and
entertain, but it always ends up the same way.  She also tries to
disallow others from playing with things.
 
It seems no one has fun anymore......this constant challenging is not fun
for anyone.  There is more dominating then playing going on.  None of it
is sexual so I haven't been thinking adrenal.
 
I need help.  Any suggestions would be greatly appreciated.
 
Thank you :)
 
You were once wild here. Don't let them tame you.
 Isadora Duncan~~
 
A wound will not heal until the matter is given words and witness
Clarissa Pinkola Estes~~
[Posted in FML issue 4157]