(Our scene opens upon a view of an empty cage, the barred door has been
jimmied open and the ferrets have escaped under cover of darkness....this
scene dissolves and opens upon a new one, in which we see two indistinct,
small furry figures standing in the neighbour's yard, next to a piece of
heavy equipment.)
 
Switch the Kit stands against the yellow metal side of the small rented
landscaper's backhoe and says "We can make this work Aunt Sabrina!"
 
"I don't know child, it's awfully big and we're awfully small."
 
"Yes, but these hoomans and our hoomans are out sniffing a shopping mall,
they'll be gone for hours!  I can work the gearshift and accelerator and
you can work the clutch!  These things are made to be easy to operate.
We can dig a hole big enough for thursday's FML in no time flat, we'll
only need one sweep of the blade!"
 
"I admit it's awfully tempting, that hole we dug last night isn't near
deep enough.  I was afraid it wouldn't be."
 
"You were so right Aunt Sabrina, I've never smelled poofing like that
before.  Those hooman ladies must be carrying their assholes around in
slings today."
 
"Well, lets jump up and you show me where this 'clutch' thing is, it
doesn't sound friendly."
 
"You'll see," Switch said, scrambling up into the cab " it'll be easy,
you just push down when I tell you to.  Here, let me give you a paw up."
 
"This pedal, child?"
 
"Right!  And after we're done I'm going to stash the ignition key, it's
so bright and shiny.  I wish you could see it Aunt Sabrina, I wish you
could still see."
 
"Well thank you child, so do I, but I'm an old blind skinny ferret and
that's the way things are.  My sniffer still works just fine, so lets get
those pages underground before the smell makes me yark up a hairball."
 
(With that Switch the Kit grabs the ignition key in her teeth and gets
the yellow metal beast roaring into smoky life, and the ladies are off,
with a jerk and a grind, slowly maneuvering the backhoe down the sidewalk
and into their yard.)
 
Alexandra in Massachusetts
Hoping there will be no need for a sequell
[Posted in FML issue 3855]