Is dealing with the grief that you experience after a ferret is lost to a
tragic accident different than loosing a ferret to illness?  I think even
if we haven't experienced this we know deep down inside it must be.  I
have not experienced this, but the nature of these animals has it so that
the odds are in my favor that someday... I will.
 
It's impossible to be perfect and attentive to so many details in owning
ferrets.  So many hundreds of things can go wrong in a day from something
as simple as a slip of a paw within a cage door slot as you are shutting
it to something as bizarre as a ferret climbing into a dishwasher.  One
can't be prefect year round, for years.  And if your ferret is free roam,
or has a lot of free roam hours, the higher the chance is that an
accident will happen.  You just can't simply account for every person
coming in and out of your doors, for everything someone may drop out of
their pockets, and every cup of hot coffee that a ferret may reach no
matter how hard you try.
 
Illness allows you to have the preparation for the possibility ... that
you're ferret won't live to see another day.  Whether that is five
minutes or years.  Even though we manage to twist our feelings into guilt
over illness and death from illness that is truly not our faults ... one
still has the deep seated knowledge, that they did not cause this.  They
can tell themselves its beyond their help.  They may not tell them selves
that.  But the fact remains that they have this "out" as a defense
mechanism whether its conscious or not.
 
I've spoken with other ferret owners that have experienced accidents of
one form or another with their ferrets via email on the Internet.  I am
floored at how differently these people experience grief.  I see more
"depression" in people who deal with ferret illness.  But I see more
"trauma" in a different way in the people that experience accidents.
Even if the person goes from the blues or mild transient depression to
clinical depression about a ferret loss from illness, it seems more
predictable.  The stages, the feelings, all seem more natural to us.
When a ferret is lost to an accident, the owner seems to go through a
whole different set of emotions.
 
I wanted to ask those that have gone through such an instance, no matter
the cause, if they can ... share what they went through.  I'm asking
because as I said,,, it's certain someday something will happen to me
myself.  I'd like to know in advance what ball game to play so to speak.
I'm also asking because I'm willing to bet many people have gone through
this but have been scared to talk about it in fear of being judged.  I'm
not asking anyone to divulge any information about how their ferret died.
In fact I ask that you please do not share this in regard to this post.
I think it would take away from the goal of this post ... that is a call
for information about the emotions, thoughts, and feelings that one goes
though after the fact, and how they dealt with them.  I think its helpful
if people write about their accidents so that we can be alert to be
careful..  we all need to be reminded.  But I ask that they make those
posts separate from this thread if they go to do so.
 
Thank you
Wolfy
 
Please visit:
http://www.geocities.com/wolfysluv/
for information on ferret deafness:
http://www.geocities.com/wolfysluv/deaf.html
[Posted in FML issue 3850]