Betty,
I don't appreciate your response to my post on the FML.  First of all, are
you on the FML to help/listen to others or to bash those of us who aren't
as knowledgable about ferrets?  I am a very new ferret owner and just
because I am not as educated on ferrets as some of the FML members, there
is no reason to bash my questions.  Or should I say, there is no reason
to bash my word choice of my questions.
 
>We need to stop focusing on the symptom and start looking at what the
>core issue of the problem is.
 
As a new ferret owner, my whole reason of using the FML is to learn about
ferrets.  I posted my email about the urinating because I wanted to know
WHY my ferrets do things BECAUSE I don't know the core issue of the
problem.  You COULD have kindly written a note about how I should consider
the fact that I have a new ferret.  (Even though I already know that).
MANY people have kindly written emails directly to me about possibilities
of why Coonsie is behaving so.  I figured it was because of the new ferret
or else a medical problem, but I was unsure of how to go about finding out
and what to do, which is why I posted an email requesting help/advice.
 
>When a ferret is urinating where it shouldn't be, and it wasn't doing it
>before a new ferret came into the home, ask yourself why the arrival of
>the new ferret would cause the established ferret to do what you don't
>want him to do?  Obviously rule out any medical conditions before
>proceeding.  It is important to separate toilet habits from territorial
>behaviour because the two need to be handled differently."
 
I appreciate your advice on separating terretorial behaviour from toilet
habits...but its HOW to do so that I don't know.  I have read many
websight articles and books and want to be a good ferret mom.  It hurt me
to read your post because it was almost as if you were reprimanding me
(even though you referred to me only as "the poster").  Do you reprimand
a student for not knowing something, when they never knew it in the first
place?  I am a school teacher, which is why I use a student example :)
 
I am trying my best to learn.  And SO many people have helped me - which I
appreciate very much.  FYI, Coonsie had an overnight stay at the vet, and
it turns out that he has a urinary infection.  If I had read your advice
before I took him to the vet, I might not have brought him because I was
shunned so much for thinking something was wrong.
 
>The poster also mentioned that they had to separate the two ferrets
>because after an hour or so, the play turned into fighting.  One of the
>biggest mistakes ferret owners make is that they separate ferrets ar too
>early when they really shouldn't.
 
Maybe I made a mistake of separating my ferrets when they fight too much.
But when i see blood and hear screams, I didn't think that was normal.
I appreciate your input though.  Reading what many other people have
written, I was under the impression that they need to be separated
sometimes.  When the baby ferret would at times frantically claw at her
cage trying to get in the fastest possible way, I took that as a sign
that she was scared and annoyed and wants to be separate from Coonsie for
a while.  She is always in a hiding spot and stays there until Coonsie
finds a way to get in, or else until she thinks she's safe and only finds
herself hiding again.
 
>I don't believe in the concept of ferrets never getting along with other
>ferrets.  Why?  Because I see it time and time again that this way of
>thinking is just plain wrong."
 
You are definately entitled to your own opinion.  And you had plenty of
proof to your stand, also.  But until now, I have not received one
response from anyone that says to let them fight it out, even if there IS
screaming and blood.  So I figured that if I have not read or heard
anything about this, then I should separate them.  I value your post and
will now look further into it.  Thanks!
 
>And I do need to mention one other thing... a ferret that hits the litter
>box 100% of the time now, is not guaranteed to stay like that forever.
 
I completely know this and have never said that I expect this.  But when
the litter box hit is 0%, that is when I get worried because it is a
change, not just a little one.  I knew there HAD to be a reason Coonsie
won't use the litter box, which is why I posted my question...I wanted to
find out why this was happening so I can know that it is normal, expected,
a sign of something, a sickness, or what.
 
In conclusion, my whole purpose of this response was to let you know that
I felt your response was reprimanding and it shyed me away from the FML
and makes me question the whole purpose of the FML.  Although, I do want
you to know that about 10% of the bitterness I felt was sweet.  I value
your advice and input.  Up until now I have had nothing but considerate
help and advice.  You can't always read everything in websites and books.
It takes people's learning through trial and error to help others!  And
that part I do appreciate.  Thanks.
 
Jen (Steve, Coonsie, and Hunny)
[Posted in FML issue 3777]