Well, I know they all start like this, but I sure didn't think I'd be
writing this letter so soon.  My precious Bear Ryan, a six year old sable
male, passed to the Bridge Thursday evening.  I found him Wednesday night,
sprawled under the couch, with a large mass in his abdomen.  I had just
done my "ferret inspections" on the previous Saturday, and hadn't felt
anything but his enlarged spleen.  This definitely wasn't his spleen.
Bear was unable to walk, or even hold his head up.  I rushed him to the
emergency clinic, and they told me, "It's pretty hopeless," after just
looking at him.  I certainly wasn't satisfied with that, so I took Bear
home.  He made it through the night, and actually seemed to improve the
slightest bit.  I took him to our vet in the morning, and the vet was
slightly hopeful, and said he would do exploratory.  I left my sweet puppy
dog ferret with him, and told them to call me before and during surgery.
They called me at about ten after six to say that they had given him
Sub-Q's and antibiotics.  They said they were going to sedate him, and
they would call me back after they had opened him up.  They called me with
the worst news possible.  His adrenal tumor had punctured his aorta, and
his abdomen was filled with blood.  It's at this point that I must state
Bear showed *absolutely* no signs at all.  No hair loss, or even excessive
itchiness, no change in appetite, or potty habits, no sexual aggression.
He was "lazy," but he'd been that way since I adopted him and his three
sisters (Bandit, Smokey, and Grandma) about four months ago.  The
technician that called said there was nothing they could do for him.  I
rushed up there, and he was still alive.  He had waited for his Mommy.  He
wasn't on any life support either, it was all him.  I told him that I
loved him, I was so very sorry that I didn't know he was sick, I didn't
mean to be a bad mommy, and I tried everything that I could.  Then I told
him about the Rainbow Bridge, and Sandee.  Afterwards, the vet helped him
to the Bridge.  The one thing I'd never gotten to see Bear do was the
Weasel War Dance.  (Although I did see him give Daddy's tummy a good chomp
or two when he was in the right mood!) But, just as we were leaving the
hospital the song "I Hope You Dance" played on the radio.  Which makes me
believe my little (well, not really so little, but oh well...) baby is up
in the Meadow, running, and playing, and dooking, and DANCING his little
butt off for me.
 
Sandee, I hate having to write to you...but could you please keep an eye
out for my little Bear Ryan?  I have only been him Mommy for about four
months, but I'll love him forever.  He'll be all alone, as he doesn't know
anyone up there that I know of.  He may have some friends waiting from his
old parent's house, but I'm not sure...Maybe you could introduce him to my
bridged babies (although none of them are ferts) Sara, Spike, Benny,
Snowflake, Teddybear, Blizzard, Greyhound, and possibly Buzz.  (A mixture
of a cat, three mice, a hamster, two bunnies, and a doggie that
disappeared a few years ago...) He may want to talk to them.  Please tell
him that I love him, and that I'll be looking to the skies a lot more.
 
Bear, Mommy is so sorry.  I didn't know you were sick, Sweetie.  I tried
everything I could, and in the end I did what I thought was the best for
you.  I was only granted the opportunity to be your Mommy for a few
months, but don't think that I don't love you just as much as all the
other assorted critters that live here.  Baby, I hope you're having a
great time up there, with everyone else's bridge ferts.  I'll miss you
forever, Baby.  You live now in my heart, instead of my house.  And Bear,
I hope you dance, Baby.
Love forever, Mommy.
 
Sorry this is so long, guys...but I know if anyone will understand, it's
you.  Much love to you and yours.
 
Lolli and the Mini-Zoo (Bridget, Brandon, Zoe, Zeus, Bandit, Grandma,
Smokey- ferts who are so missing their big brother; Molly- cat; Dykers
and Midnight- dogs; Charlie- hamster; and Sycamore- boa.)
[Posted in FML issue 3541]