My sweet Lil Bear:
 
I don't know for sure what your first 2 years of life were like, but I know
the last year has been a very difficult one for you.  When your family had
to move, they had to place you in a shelter until they could find another
place that accepted ferrets.  Time went on and, for one reason or another,
you were sent to a different shelter.  From there, you began a journey to a
breeder.  You spent a week at each of the homes of several volunteers who
were working to get you to your new home.  Fortunately, the breeder you
were going to had a firm policy of only accepting ferrets that had been
tested for ADV.  I think you were at your 5th house when the results came
back positive.  That's when you came to live with me instead.
 
You seemed so resigned when I picked you up.  You just looked at me and
sighed when you were placed in my car, and then you hid under a blanket
in your cage.  You were so wary at my house.  For months you hid behind
furniture whenever you saw me.  You flinched each time I came near you or
wanted to pick you up.  You ran if I came into the room you were in.  I put
a T-shirt of mine in your sleeping place, but you pushed it out.  That made
me feel so bad.  I felt that you didn't like me.  After a few months, I was
afraid you never would like me or your new home.  After you were neutered,
though, you made friends with my Samson and Kodiak.  They were the first
ferrets you ever had made friends with.  Soon you three were inseparable.
It was so neat to watch them "teach" you to play ferret games.  You looked
so bewildered at first...wondering what on earth they were doing.  When
they leaped on you to wrestle with you, you thought they wanted to fight
you, and you whimpered and ran.  Finally, though, you realized they just
wanted to play.  Now, you leap on them with great joy.  The first time you
went through the play tube, you war danced all over the room.  "I did it!"
This is fun!" is what your dancing said.  In the last couple of months,
you've had 2 speeds...running full out and war dancing backwards through
the house.
 
After much time, love and patience, you finally stopped running when I
came into a room.  2 weeks ago, you hopped up onto the couch where I was
sitting...the first time you ever voluntarily came to where I was.  I'm
sure you didn't realize how happy you made me.  Since then, you've stopped
flinching when I reach toward you.  In fact, you often come to me and rest
your head on the top of my foot.  Or you touch my foot with your nose and
look at me...asking to be picked up and cuddled.  You brought such joy into
my life...my heart felt like as though it were overflowing.  It took 5 long
months, but you finally accepted me.  Thank you so much for giving me your
trust and love, Lil Bear.
 
I found out this week that, although you are a gorgeous, healthy looking
boy, you not only came to me ADV positive...but you came to me with
clinical Aleutian disease.  Even though you're only 3 years old, we will
not have a lot of time together.  My poor Lil Bear...you've only just
learned how to be a ferret, yet already I can see you tiring sooner and
wanting to sleep more.  Your blood work says you're a very sick little
boy inside, despite how you look on the outside.
 
So now I feel that I need to apologize to you, Lil Bear.  I have not been
a good spokesperson for Aleutian disease.  I have not been able to touch
people's hearts so that they care enough about researching this virus that
is killing you.  I have not been able to help them see that *something*
needs to be done to prevent any more stories like yours.  Your story should
have had a happy ending.  For a little while, at least, I thought it would.
 
Please know, Lil Bear, that I would do anything to make you better if it
were only in my power.  I would pay whatever price, if surgery could help
you or even give you more time.  I would buy whatever medication, no matter
the cost, if it would stop this virus from causing your body to destroy
itself...even for a while.  But there is nothing I can do except watch
helplessly as each day takes you closer towards a horrible death.  If I
had not failed so miserably in my attempts to get more people to care about
Aleutian Disease, maybe the researchers would at least have gotten enough
money to be working on a treatment of some kind.  I can't even tell you
that it looks like enough money will be donated to help ferrets that come
down with Aleutian disease a few years from now.  Most people just don't
seem to care much about this virus, Lil Bear.  Despite all that's been
said and done by people with ferrets like you, I don't think other people
believe Aleutian disease is that big of a deal...or that it will ever
affect them.  I can understand...I sure never thought I'd have ferrets
with Aleutian Disease either.
 
Anyway, Lil Bear, I just wanted to let you know that it hurts my heart
terribly, but the only thing I can do for you is to love you for the too
short time you have left.  And I wanted you to know that I'm so very sorry
that I didn't do my job better.  It isn't fair that you're the one that
will suffer for my failure.  I love you, Lil Bear.
 
Judy
 
Please give to Aleutian Disease research...the ferret you save may be your
own!
http://www.geocities.com/russiansmom/index.html
[Posted in FML issue 3408]