Georgia wrote:
>Matan, Kim Shilling - TALK TO EACH OTHER!  Actually, Matan, Kim has a
>truly wonderful book out, through a publisher that perhaps does, or can,
>translate to hebrew, or that you can do the translation for.
 
Yes, this book is absolutely marvelous for anyone!  I know of vets who keep
it around to educate people, too!  Kim may be a bit too busy with health
concerns such as her broken back and broken pelvis from a riding accident
to teach extensively right now, though.  The publishing house certainly
will be able to discuss translation options.
 
Matan, when I was very young and anticipating I also thought that
reproduction was THE primary need for each individual.  That is a pretty
natural thing for pre-teens and teens to think, an opinion of that kind is
natural to those whose hormones are turning on and gushing around like a
river at flood stage as a biological response, even if it is not the most
balanced of ones till the body evens out somewhat.  Heck, I didn't even
like getting flowers back then since they are the sexual organs of those
plants.  Actually, once you are past your own hormonal swells you will find
on a gut level again that there is a great deal more to quality of life.
 
If you do think of writing a book, Matan, you will need to interact and
LISTEN to those who have much more experience than you have.  That is not a
criticism, simply a bluntly stated fact.  Even those who do have a lot of
experience (such as Kim) have long lists of thank yous to those whose
advice, comments, and suggestions made their books as good as they are.
Take a look at Kim's beautiful acknowledgements section when you buy her
book, _Ferrets for Dummies_ in which about 50 people are thanked.
 
As years pass life becomes more and more like looking between stars on a
cloudless country night.  The more you look, the more stars appear, while
patterns you once thought clear are erased by them, and it becomes that
the patterns are no longer what is most important: the looking is.
 
Erica wrote:
>I think Matan is trying to what he believes is right.  We should not
>insult him or condemn him for having different opinions.  He is coming
>here for help and I think he cares for his ferrets.  We need to be more
>supportive and helpful.
 
I think that the problem is to a large extent a growing feeling of
frustration.  Matan comes on and forcefully calls for help, but then he
absolutely refuses to listen to most of it while demanding more.  That
leaves everyone else in an incredibly frustrating bind.  If he will not
listen to whatever he doesn't want to hear then he can't learn, but instead
of accepting that basic fact of life that he also has a responsibility in
this exchange, he then comes on again and demands new information when
the strictures of the situation leave only a few already-stated options
biologically that are safest for the jill.  I know that Matan is young,
painfully young in this case, and I know that changes perceptions as do
sociocultural aspects, but there is still the personal factor, and people
of any age and in any cultural group typically learn: 1.  that they can
not have their way in everything and 2.  that often the only way to learn
is to "listen".
 
BTW, yes, Matan HAS written to me privately in the past, and I can verify
that Bev Burge who has spoken with him by phone is real, too.  Bev was a
seminal figure in helping one of the best vets I know make some tough
choices when he was young himself.  She's marvelous!
 
Matan wrote:
>KIM - here in ISRAEL its exacly like USA so dont think i dont have money
>to e mail or stuff like that.  and its nor for sex of course but its no
>pass on their genes.
 
There is no need to be defensive, Matan.  Kim was kindly giving you
the benefit of the doubt and pointing out that there simply could be
extenuating factors which are not known to most.  That was a kindness she
extended to you.
 
There are many biologists with doctorates in E&E or genetics who would
disagree, Matan!  What you find "stupid" or a negation of a "fact" or
"narrow minded" can actually be seen completely differently from a
differing perspective or with more information.
 
Hey, I would NOT want any of you to know what I was like in my preteen and
many of my teen years!  Yuck!  I was AWFUL.  I did improve a bit, though,
as the years wore off many edges and made me admire more how much I don't
know. ;-)  It seems to me that there are people on BOTH of the extreme
sides of this who aren't bothering to listen anymore, so here is Glueball's
laughingly given advice: take a q-tip and some ear cleaning solution and
try it on yourselves, then LISTEN!  -)    *****PLEASE!*****
[Posted in FML issue 3453]