- Walk in front of male as much as possible.
- Try to show as much of your back side and tail frequently. Tail swishing
is especially effective.
...Male will begin to look your way at this point, it may take five minutes
or it may take five days depending on the male.
- Expose oneself in front of male at every opportunity ...You may find said
male beginning to follow you more, he may be at your heels like your shadow
and/or he may just be unusually communicative and vocal. Vocalizations may
vary from understandable language to nonsensical chatter and noises. If he
demonstrates any of this behavior, act coyly. Later, you may respond with
smiles and more of previous behaviors.
- Brush up, touch, paw at, push, hug, and tackle male often. ...You may at
this point in time notice your mates grooming behaviors have varied. His
hair may take on an oily or greasy appearance so as to look all "slickered
up" and handsome for you. He thinks his hair is softer and more attractive
this way also. You may notice him beginning to smelling a bit differently.
He is doing this for you also. Just remember, it is all for you in his
eyes.
- Kiss and lick male here and there in very brief intervals, but
frequently. ...Said male will begin to act impulsively. He may do
something aggressive and abrupt such as grabbing onto your tail, or
clinging on to you.
- Just act is if he is not there when he tries to do such things. ...The
male may begin regularly marking his territory (your home).
- Ignore him. ...At this point in time his eyes may have an appearance
of rings around them from lack of sleep as he can only think of one thing
now: .you. He will be acting all full of himself at this point. Parading
around and such. Demonstrating his abilities to get your attentions. He
may show you previews of what is to come on that special night by acting
"it" out on everything nearest to him. This is to impress you.
- Nay, do not be impressed! Tell him: you are not impressed yet. ...He
will grease his hair and spruce up more and more. He will make himself
smell prettier and prettier by putting on musky "cologne". And he will
proceed to grab you more and more as you walk by, and even at times
aggressively kissing your neck.
- Do not be impressed. Tell him, over and over, no, you are not ready yet.
Look at this specimen before you, size him up, and the just say coyley,
"no.." ...The male may then close to being ready. He will demonstrate this
by war dancing all about for you in very impressive ways. But do not be
impressed. He is still not ready. Said male will vocalize to you in such
a way to tell you he is past ready, and that he may die if you are not
impressed yet. But I repeat, do not be impressed.
- At this point, you may want to vocalize back to the male. Parade about
for him showing your pretty self and body. Do so often. But when he makes
his advances, stop. ...Said male will have at this point in time, begin to
act very maucho. He may assert himself by marking anything and every thing
as HIS territory. He wants so very much to impress you. Lifting his tail
and poofing around home will be a regular thing. He may in desperation
poof everywhere he goes with you. If you are really lucky, you may witness
a sliming!
- By this time I would give him some encouragement. We want him to be the
most he can be, and it takes much to impress a female. ...He will react
with very aggressive overtures, first by mightily dancing about, and
vocalizing very, very loudly and assertively, then by even grabbing and
clinging onto you. If you are lucky, you may be scruffed. When he gets
this physical, take note of his testicles, if they aren't three times as
large as their normal size he must wait longer, as you will not be
impressed.
- Now comes the test, ask the male for everything in the world. You will
get one of two things. You will either get "everything in the world", or
you be the most impressed female on the block! *caution: This may not be
safe unless practiced with a v-hob, otherwise kits may result.
I'd like to thank my technical advisors Kim Rushing, Vickie Henderson, and
Georgia Wood.
Wolfy
Please visit:
http://www.geocities.com/wolfysluv/
for information on ferret deafness:
http://www.geocities.com/wolfysluv
[Posted in FML issue 3303]
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