First off, and a serious note (yes, I can be serious when my over
fertilized, er fertile mind lets me).  My condolences to all who've lost
their babies or have sick ones.  It's fun ribbing each other and helping to
lighten people's day with our comedy.  And I'm really glad to see others
joining in on the theme!  This makes it even more fun.  Thanks Bill, for
doing a great job-hope we're giving you some chuckles too.
 
Okay, onto the 'battle'!:
 
Sukie, thank you EVER so much for sending the trebuchet through the
computer.  You and Steve have just made life in this house sooooo much
more interesting.
 
I thought the computer upstairs was off, but I kept hearing something.  I
was slowly walking upstairs, hearing ferrety chuckles and heard things
being shut down, jumping going on.  I get upstairs and am met by the most
innocent faces you've ever seen.  Quite a number of 'Stuart Little' grins.
I really enjoyed the dances taking me away from the bathroom and the spare
room.  Later found out why...... Seems that a pair of pantyhose and a bra
were used in making a different type of catapult/trebuchet.  Since only one
person in this house is allowed power tools (my SO) the devious minds went
to work.  Can you imagine the range you get with a bra and pantyhose
stretched across desks and door knobs?  It's pretty darn good, lemme tell
you.  We had cats flying everywhere, the little plastic rounds left when
scotch tape is used can be quite deadly.  So Kouri-you got competition
here.  I even go upstairs with a white flag!  But just a while ago Larry
made mention that some of his tools are missing...... Genie, naturally,
has been the engineer in charge.  I know she carries her own little slide
rule/calculator.  She's the mistress of jumps in our house.  Wears a little
hard hat for construction, her own little tool belt, but being a lady she
never lets it slip to show her butt, er, tail crack.  She's a lady, you
know!
 
The question was asked how does Kouri keep from stressing out.
C'mon!  He's so wired on all that caffeine that boy never slows down.
Remember-"Chock full o' nuts", the "George of the Jungle" scene and you've
got Kouri!  Georgia just keeps this big can of it handy and whenever Kouri
starts winding down he dives in for more!  Can you imagine the speed he
builds things, cooks-hey, two or three bites of that coffee and you have
a state banquet for the White House!  And can you imagine the speed of
construction on "This Old House"?  And, when he hits five, if he starts
"This Old Weasel" the sale of power tools suddenly shoots up-people's
ferrets will suddenly be studying wood working, creating lovely stair
cases, homes -and the union again will step in to make sure it's all done
correctly.  Can you see building inspectors disagreeing with ferrets-
they'd lose for certain (pencils, permits, keys, billfolds....)
 
Tracey: think how short a meeting would be if run by ferrets.  No
arguments, voting swiftly done, all water on the large conference table
spilled so that synchronized sliding, dancing, and dooking could happen.
Any stuffy board members would immediately be 'unstuffed' because ferrets
would be running up their pant legs!
 
A video with Kouri demonstrating shooting?  I can see this on a Sunday
morning on one of the sports channels: "Shooting with Kouri: the safe way
to shoot" and all the NRA folks.  An interpreter will have to be present
for when Kouri gets excited and tries to give Mr. Heston his insight!
People will be dropping for cover as Kouri gets his little paws on a semi
automatic and proceeds to blast all the surrounding targets to shreds.
 
Hmmm, Ashling Ferret and a hang glider.  I'm not even going to mention this
to my group.  I have several that think they're already "Rocky the Flying
Squirrel".  Good heavens, can you see the "Hang Gliding Ferret"?  "Snoopy
helmet" on the head, white scarf around the neck, let's see, color of hang
glider will have to be bright red and yellow (nothing dull for these kids),
bandoliers around their bodies that are loaded with water balloons, little
headsets hooked into the helmets to keep in contact with home.  Georgia,
the neighbors think they're in trouble with Kouri shooting out the windows,
we're all in deep doo-doo if they form the "Flying Ferrets Air Force".  Can
you imagine, hard day at work, you come home thinking to rest, let your
kids out and suddenly your house is full of hang gliding fuzzies dropping
water balloons on the cats, you, the guests.  Then they get outside
(they'll have homing devices hooked onto the gliders) as they terrorize
the neighborhood.  They might even bring Dorothy and Toto back to the
castle---ooops, sorry!  That's the Wizard of Oz there invading.  I don't
even want to think about some of mine with hang gliders!  Suzy would be
the scourge of Indiana!  But you know, between the 'Ferret flinging" onto
mattresses with velcro, this could be another Ferret Olympic competition".
 
Sukie-Kouri not only on "Yan Can" or "The Naked Chef", but you know that
Wolfgang Puck will be calling soon for his recipe for ferret cookies!
Wait, Neiman Marcus will want this recipe too......
 
And Wolfy-how's the 'rutting dancer' doing?  I read that to my husband
and almost got a bath in coffee for that one!  So Pongo & Scott might be
working on an 'emission horn', huh?  Okay, everybody to the army surplus
stores for gas masks (make sure filters are on them).  Wolfy, you might
be able to use a dry depends for a filter (note operative word DRY).  Set
a little motor onto that red wagon of yours for quick escapes.  Mental
picture folks-Wolfy in the little red wagon, motor going, gas mask on her
face racing down the road, Carpet Shark Scott in hot pursuit (minds out of
the gutter now) trying to do his rutting dance while carrying Pongo on his
arm, locking and loading the boy's tuckus while trying to set the emission
horn up.  And in hot pursuit of this is the police and a few men carrying
white coats and more depends.
 
Um, I just heard something drop upstairs and some hammering-better sneak up
there and see what's going on-NO, DON'T YOU DARE USE THAT PAIR OF PANTYHOSE
ONE ME... HEEEEELLLLLLLPPPPPPPPPP
 
Rebecca & the Crew of Merry Mayhem
"Do not meddle in the affairs of dragons, for thou art crunchy, and =
 taste good with ketchup"
[Posted in FML issue 3298]