I am asking all of you who love your babies to PLEASE read this.  My little
Tessa (mommy's Tess-girl) died Friday night.  When I got home she was
almost comatose, deathly anemic and ice cold.  We had no choice.  My
little girl died in my arms, going I pray, to a better & happier place.
 
I sent a letter to the FML weeks ago, after she had her spleen removed and
was diagnosed with Lympho-sarcoma.
 
I want to send loving thanks to those of you who took the time to send
private emails, and to those of you (especially you Jackie) who have taken
the time to keep in touch with me, who have sent love and prayers to Tessa.
I received alot of support and advice.  It was on this advice that we
started Tessa on prednazone and also, Essiac.  It hurts like hell that
through all my research and all my efforts, I couldn't save my girl.
Thank God I had so much time (almost 2 months) to say my goodbyes.  My
little girl who never really liked to be touched or handled, learned to
need me enough in the end to be stroked, kissed, cuddled and held.
 
I wanted to keep her for so much longer.  And I wish I had seen the signs.
So please take care of your babies and watch them carefully for changes.
We saw Tessa slowing down way too much along time ago, maybe a year or so
ago, maybe even longer.  We never questioned it, I wish we had.  She slept
alot more and hissed alot, like she had no patience for the others.  We
never even thought it meant anything.  Now I know.  We didn't take her for
her check-up at the right time.  We waited till she got sick, when she
should of been in last summer.  But you get busy and they're o.k.  and so
you don't rush.  But we should have.  I bet we could of saved her if we
had.  You can bet we won't make that mistake again.  The rest of my gang
will go in regularily, need it or not.  And I have alot of medical info.
on hand I intend to read, to educate myself, so next time we'll be able to
find any sicknesses in time.  So there won't be another next time.  Please
watch your kids, take them in for their visits regularily, make the time.
Saying goodbye and letting go to one of your family is way too painful a
lesson.  This hurts way too much.
 
I sent emails to encourage others who were battling their evils too, I
wanted to help everyone else so much.  Even though I couldn't save my
little girl, I hope those of you out there fighting, will fight hard.  Keep
trying.  Don't give up.  A month ago we spent $300.00 having Tessa's spleen
removed even though we knew we were only buying her time, I wouldn't change
that decision for anything.  I bought us another month of love and kisses.
 
Thanks again for everyone's support and love.  We wish you all the best.
God Bless.
 
Nikki & the Kidz (Snoopy, Bailey, Tigger-Roo and Tessa, gone but in our
hearts 4ever)
[Posted in FML issue 3403]