Dee, what you probably don't know is that there is a very small contingent
on the FML who hate Mary and Eric personally, as well as some who
apparently have a financial interest in their competition which is fine as
long as all play fair (some of these past posts have appeared from nowhere
as first or early posts), and in the past these few have found excuses to
say things which just bordered on admissible for the list, so in case any
of those were tempted to reply to your question as a way to stir up trouble
again (especially when money becomes a great motivator) it was just
important to head off such tacky behavior, that's all.  In addition, we at
the FML have had our share of those who simply like to stir up hornets'
nests just to make others uncomfortable, a nasty trouble-causing group
which has received a good deal of attention from internet anthropologists
and is rather well documented.
 
There was one other reason as well: M&E do read the FML when they get a
chance and maybe some kind words will serve a good function during this
hard time.
 
When a serious illness is present it is sadly often not possible to know
dates.  If you haven't been there at an earlier time in your life you will
be someday and then this will be more clear.  Perhaps at such a time you
will even mentally kick yourself before you forgive yourself, perhaps not.
Variety in perceptions is useful overall.
 
I grew up in a successful business family and did well in retail management
before I went to college as an adult.  Interestingly, knowing MORE about
business has led to my being MORE tolerant of variations due to unavoidable
circumstances, rather than less tolerant.  Of course, I was also the
little, skinny child who would drag the bullies off their victims (an act
of bravado which usually saved me from being beaten myself -- though not
always at which point I'd fight back) so it seems to be in my character
to be concerned for those who are down.
 
Those who know me are free to joke about my once having been skinny and
short in relation to my current dimensions.
[Posted in FML issue 3147]