Dear FML: Ferret math has struck and this household now has five ferrets - Koka - the silver bullet - Bill - the strongest ferret in the world - Phoebe - the boss ferret - Tara - the softest ferret in the world and now introducing - Ruskie - a champagne ferret formerly owned by a Russian guy who speak no English. I have changed the names in this true story to protect the innocent. Last summer a neighbour who was about a quarter mile away at a bar-b-q called to ask if I was missing any of my ferrets? I said no ....why? Because a ferret wearing a shoulder harness had joined them for the festivities. I instructed them to corner him/her and I would be right there. As I got there the ferret was about to scamper across a very busy street so I grabbed him. A successful rescue!!! I took his shoulder harness off and put him in a cage in the car with food water ferretone, etc and was talking to the host when up the street came a man obviously looking for something. Thats my neighbour and he is Russian...He speaks no English said the host. He aproached us and I tried to explain why his ferret was in my car and than got him out and gave him to the Russian. I am sure he was grateful but because he could not speak English it was hard to know. Anyway I went home satisfied the issue was resolved. This week while out canvassing (did I mention I am running for political office up here in Canada?) I saw a notice on the hydro pole about a found ferret.... and this was very close to the original site. I called the number when I got home and explained that I perhaps knew what the story was and where was the ferret? He was living under an extension of their porch and would come out for food every morning. They had owned ferrets some years back and had an inkling of what to do but did not want him... So I dropped off a cage filled with blankets food and water and told her to toss him in when she fed him and call me. Next morning she called and I went to see him. I was pretty sure who I was going to find and sure enough it was the same ferret so after little or no thought I decided to keep him and my reasoning is this....if you lose a ferret once that is a mistake but if it happens twice that is stupidity. Even my vet found my reasoning sound . So he got a clean bill of health and his shots and I now have him at home and am preparing to integrate him into my house. I am not sure if he speaks English but he sure understands raisins!!!! I think he will do really well he is a sweety.. I know some of you will think I am a creep but I could never forgive myself if I took him back and he escaped again and did not make it across the road... So I guess it is true what they say about politicians and political wannabees. DO NOT trust us around your ferrets and especially if you are prone to losing them cos guess what...finders keepers....losers weepers. Lynn [Posted in FML issue 3225]